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30 Footballers With Funny Names

30 Footballers With Funny Names

COOK some RICE, DRINKWATER and CHILLWELL thereafter!

Originally posted: 21 September, 2022.
Updated: 18 January, 2024.

Most footballers have names that are easy to pronounce and fans love it when commentators scream those names. On the other hand, some players have funny names which makes one wonder why they were named so.

In this post, FootballOrbit presents you with 30 footballers with funny names.

This article is not in anyway trying to mock the players.

1. Răzvan Rat

Rat. Footballers funny names

Răzvan Dincă Raț is a Romanian former footballer who mainly played as a left-back for the likes of Shakhtar Donetsk, Westham United and Rayo Vallecano.

His name instantly reminds one of those rodents that terrorise homes, especially at night.

Rat retired in 2018.

2. Steve Cook

Cook is an English defender who plays for Championship side, QPR.

The 32-year-old had earlier played for clubs like Brighton & Hove Albion, Bournemouth and Nottingham Forest in his career.

3. Declan Rice

Rice. Footballers funny names

Rice plays as a midfielder for Arsenal after establishing himself as one of the best defensive midfielders in the world at West Ham, where he was captain.

Oryza sativa?

4. Yaya Banana

Banana is a Cameroonian defender that currently plays for AS Trouville-Deauville in France.

He has 16 caps for Cameroon.

When he scores a goal…….. Banana!!!

5. Gernot Sick

Sick is an Austrian midfielder who retired very early at the age of 28 after numerous knee operations.

6. Danger Fourpence

Danger is a former Zimbabwean defender.

Not only is his first name (Danger) hilarious, his second name (Fourpence) is also amusing. Pence is used to refer to a sum of money.

So, four pence…….

7. Daniel Killer

For real?

Yes!

Daniel Killer was a former Argentine football defender who was part of the Argentina squad that won the 1978 FIFA World Cup.

Killer was also part of the Rosario Central team that won the Primera Division Argentina Nacional championship of 1973.

He was a defender and must have made attackers shit in their pants.

8. Jazzi Barnum-Bobb

Jazzi Barnum-Bobb is from Caribbean country, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines.

He plays as a defender for Chelmsford City in the sixth tier of English football.

His name is quite funny.

9. Chris Wood

Wood is a New Zealand striker currently playing for Nottingham Forest in the Premier League.

10. Eden Hazard

Eden Hazard - 30 footballers with funny names

Hazard was one of the best players in the world in his prime, but the Belgian’s name means DANGER in English language.

Eden was actually hazardous at Chelsea, wasn’t he?

11. Eric Djemba Djemba

Eric Djemba Djemba is a Cameroonian former midfielder who was most notable for his transfer to Manchester United in 2003.

Although Djemba Djemba’s time at Old Trafford was underwhelming, he played for clubs in France, England, Qatar, Denmark, Israel, Serbia, Scotland, India and Indonesia.

At international level, he played for Cameroon 34 times and represented his country at the 2002 FIFA World Cup.

12. Daley Blind

Daley Blind - Ajax jersey. Footballers funny names

Blind is a versatile Dutch player who currently plays for Girona in La Liga. He is the son of former Ajax defender and former Netherlands national team manager, Danny Blind.

Like his father, Daley also played for Ajax (across two different spells).

13. Have-A-Look Dube

Have-A-Look was known to have played for the Zimbabwe national team and Njube Sundowns at club level.

Not much is known of him, so to know more about him……… you got to have-a-look by yourself!!!

14. Robbie Savage

Savage is a former Welsh midfielder who played for the likes of Manchester United, Leicester City, Birmingham City, Blackburn Rovers and Derby County.

As his name suggests, Savage’s style of play was as an all-action and energetic midfielder.

He regularly collected yellow cards, and at a time; he held the unwanted record of being awarded the most yellow cards in Premier League history.

Furthermore, Robbie Savage was very controversial during his career. Savagery?

Fans of opposition teams regularly accused him of simulation, whether to win a set piece or to get an opponent red carded.

Another famous example of his eccentric behaviour was when he was at Leicester City. In an incident famously known as “Poogate”; Savage bizarrely used the referee’s toilet before a game — claiming he had an upset stomach due to antibiotics he was on at the time!

Robbie Savage is now a football pundit and don’t be surprised when he savages your favourite team or player on TV!

15. Danny Diver

Diver is a former Scottish footballer and manager. He played as a striker and what a name he has for someone playing that role!

Guess what………..

Penalties!!!

16. Roberto Dinamite

Carlos Roberto de Oliveira — known as Roberto Dinamite — is a former Brazilian striker.

He was nicknamed “Dinamite” by journalist, Aparício Pires, of Jornal dos Sports newspaper, after scoring a spectacular goal on his debut in 1971 against International at the Maracanã stadium.

The journalist wrote in the newspaper that “the Dynamite-Boy detonates at Maracanã”.

And the name “Dinamite” stuck.

He is Vasco da Gama’s player with the most appearances and all-time top goalscorer, as well as the overall leading scorer in the Brazilian Série A.

For Brazil, Roberto Dinamite played in the 1978 and 1982 World Cups and the 1972 Olympic Games.

He was the President of Vasco da Gama from 2008 to 2014.

17. Pavel Pogrebynyak

Pavel Viktorovich Pogrebnyak is a Russian striker who last played for Ural Yekaterinburg.

Pogrebnyak had played for the likes of Spartark Moscow, Zenith St Petersburg, Stuttgart, Fulham and Reading.

His name isn’t easy for an English speaker to pronounce. He is nicknamed The Pog, Pogreb (“The Cellar”) or Velikiy Po (“Po the Great”).

18. Georgie Welcome

Georgie Welcome is a Honduran footballer who plays as a striker.

He once played for Monaco in Ligue 1.

19. Segar Bastard

https://twitter.com/RothmansYears/status/1353615001836257285?t=8vJqGW_4tkHsSDYaYydlng&s=19

Segar Bastard was an English amateur footballer who played football on an amateur basis for three clubs as well as for England once.

After his playing career, Bastard became an international referee and was held in high regard throughout English football.

20. Lomana Lua Lua

Trésor Lomana Lua Lua was a Congolese striker who played for clubs like West Ham United, Newcastle, Portsmouth and Olympiacos.

21. John Stones

John Stones Footballers funny names

Stones is an English footballer who plays as a centre-back for Premier League club Manchester City and the England national team.

He won the 2021/22 Premier League with Man City.

22. Ebbe Sand

Sand is a former Danish footballer who played as a forward for Brøndby IF in Denmark and FC Schalke 04 in Germany.

He was the Bundesliga top scorer in 2001, and won the DFB-Pokal in 2001 and 2002 with Schalke.

On the international stage, he represented the Denmark national team at the 1998 and 2002 FIFA World Cup, as well as the 2000 and 2004 European Championships.

At the 1998 World Cup, Sand
scored the fastest-ever World Cup goal by a substitute against Nigeria — scoring 16 seconds just after entering the match.

23. Danny Drinkwater

Drinkwater
Drinkwater drinking water!

Drinkwater was a midfielder who has played for the likes of Manchester United, Leicester City, Aston Villa and Chelsea.

In April 2019, Drinkwater was charged with drink-driving after crashing his Range Rover into a wall.

He pleaded guilty to drink-driving and received a 20-month driving ban.

24. Sokratis Papastathopoulos

Papastathopoulos has played for the likes of AC Milan, Werder Bremen, Borussia Dortmund and Arsenal so far.

25. Mark Fish

Fish is a retired South African footballer who played as a defender.

26. Johnny Mustache

Mustache was a Seychelles striker. His name is amusing as it refers to the growth of facial hair between the nose and the upper lip.

27. Dmytro Chyhrynskyi

Dmytro Anatoliiovych Chyhrynskyi is a Ukrainian footballer who plays as a centre-back. He became popular when he joined Barcelona in 2009.

28. Mark de Man

Mark de Man was a Belgian defender and what a perfect name he has as centre-back. Strikers beware!!!

29. Danny Invincible

Danny Invincible is a retired Australian footballer who played as an attacker during his career.

Was he VISIBLE to the opposition defenders?

30. Wolfgang Wolf

Wolfgang Wolf is a former German defender. He spent 12 seasons in the Bundesliga with FC Kaiserslautern and Stuttgarter Kickers.

Bearing that name must have scared away opposition attackers.

His son — named Patrick Wolf — also became a professional footballer. In June 2012, Wolf signed his son while working as manager for Hansa Rostock.

Which of these names did you find most hilarious? Kindly add yours in the comments section.

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